Your Identity & Suffering.
The question "Why am I here?" has long puzzled me. Delving into the mysteries of existence, pondering my "purpose," and wondering why I am the way I am have always been central themes in my life.
Recently, I embarked on a transformative journey, guided by a mentor whose awareness surpasses anyone I've ever encountered. When I think of this mentorship, the image of a tower crumbling in the tarot deck springs to mind. This signifies the shedding of old identities and beliefs, allowing oneself to evolve even amidst the fear and uncertainty that such profound changes bring.
I once resonated deeply with the "love and light" philosophy, believing I was a chosen warrior of God, facing trials designed to fortify my spirit. That narrative no longer holds true for me, but I honor and thank that version of myself for years of dedicated service.
Now, when I ask myself "Why are you here?", the answer is refreshingly simple: Because I chose to be. I chose this existence, this myriad of life experiences, and this unique perspective that only I possess.
What a privilege it is to be alive.
For those who find themselves in turmoil, I offer this perspective, though it's entirely up to you to embrace it: Your suffering is a choice. The further you distance yourself from your true essence, the more profound your anguish becomes. I understand that many might bristle at this notion, questioning how they could ever "choose" suffering. But I challenge you to reflect deeply: Are you certain?
Pain is inevitable, but suffering is a byproduct of the narratives we weave around our pain and how they shape our identity. Do you identify with suffering? Do you see yourself as the "Overcomer," the "Hero," the "Justice Warrior," or perhaps the "Noble Martyr"?
Consider the tales you've spun about your pain. What if, even for a fleeting moment, you acknowledged them with gratitude and then released them?
We all face pain, but suffering remains a choice.
Before I conclude, I'd like to reference the Cognitive Triad of Depression, introduced by Aaron Beck in 1967. It illustrates how depressive spirals often stem from negative perceptions of oneself, the world, and the future. When caught in this vortex, you're essentially succumbing to societal deceptions that obscure the true value of your existence.
I urge you to resist this pull. Reclaim your sovereignty, your inherent right to govern your life. Recognize that your existence is a gift, and your worth is immeasurable.
Your relationship with every facet of yourself is where your true magic lies. Embrace it. Remember, in the wise words of King Mufasa: Remember who YOU are.
With love,
Matthew Mann, The Sovereign Alchemist
